Sunday, October 21, 2012


Brilliant marketing. I haven't played the Big BTC tournament yet but I might today.

Saturday, October 20, 2012


Ieatfish, they ask me, how do you make the big bucks at online poker?  Do you have to multi-table?

That's up to you.  I have never used a HUD.  I consider myself a "pure" internet poker player.

Now, there's nothing wrong with using a HUD.  I wish the sites were set up in a way where they weren't an option. But naturally people will use them so long as it works, and I don't blame them. I just personally haven't gone down that route.

Which is another thing I like about playing on Seals.  HUDs don't work there. 

A typical Ieatfish session may look something like this: A short-handed or HU game or two on Seals, maybe a sng or three on Merge, and then full-ring tables on Cake network (to me it will always be Cake, not "Revolution"). 

The Cake network pays rakeback according to the "dealt hands" model. So I min-buy on those tables, and if in doubt play nitty/textbook poker.  And then generate rakeback (and hopefully some +EV chip movement in its own right) without taking up too much focus.

And on the other hand, Seals has the best action for short-handed play.  Some of the players are good, but usually not in the nitty/disciplined way.  And some players are downright bad.  So I like to be on my toes for those games.

That's my general strategy for multi-tabling.  If you can handle 20 tables at a time, more power to you.  I would suggest though that you're not really learning to play optimal poker this way (it's not possible to play optimal while you have that much going on), you're learning to play very marginal poker and multiplying it by 20. So even if you're a mass table grinder, I would suggest doing some 1-2 table practice.  You never know when you'll be in a situation where you'll want a strong A-game.

Thursday, October 18, 2012

How to stretch a dollar

Not everyone can live in a van like Ieatfish, but here are some tips and dirty tricks that you can use in any living situation to extend the value of your money:

Be open-minded in the grocery store
Most supermarkets have a shopper's card that you can sign up for to receive special prices. Signing up is a no-brainer, but also you want to shop based on what's marked down. You don't want to go in there thinking "I need Oscar Meyer bacon" or even "I need bacon". You go in there thinking you need best value, and make decisions according to what your options are.

Some items are perpetually marked down, so the "special" price is just the price. But often you'll get legit value based on overstock or wanting to push a product or whatever black magic goes into it. If you're flexible about when you eat what, you end up paying less for the same products. The only items I buy stubbornly are honey nut Cheerios and canned sardines.

Manipulate the self-checkout
When you select a produce or bakery item, look at the prices of other items and plan what you'll ring it in as (they aren't naive enough to list prices on the self-checkout screen, so you have to plan it).  You can conceivably ring anything in as anything, I think.  The machine checks for weight, but it would be news to me if it could tell a carrot from a donut.

But you want to stick to what you're comfortable with. In the off-chance you get caught, it's easy to say you thought a croissant was a roll, but are you willing to say you thought the mozarella cheese from the fancy olive bar spread was bananas? So it's up to you how far you push it.

Save your McDonald's cup
When you buy a drink from McDonald's (or whatever fast food establishment), keep your cup.  You can bring it in with you and use it again.  It's revolutionary when you realize you can do this.

I'm not saying you're expressly allowed to do it, just that the people working there are highly unlikely to notice and care, so you can physically do it. It may even be unspoken policy to let you get away with it, because the 8 cents they lose on soda is worth drawing you back in to buy food. They'd prefer you paid them $1.79 for it, but to the extent you aren't that gullible, they'd still rather have you than chase you away to Burger King.

Eventually the ink on the cup starts to fade and from time to time they change the design, so you'll need to stay current.  But really you could walk in there and fill up a water balloon and still be a favorite to make it out without any hassle.

A softer version of this trick is to ask for a water cup and fill it with soda.  But then you have a dinky little cup, and if anything it's more likely to be called out.  I prefer to plan ahead and bring my own my cup. 

Friday, October 12, 2012

Mr. Micon

Tonight I risk 1.5 BTC on Sealswithclubs chairman Bryan Micon.  He's playing a $125 NLHE tournament at the Orleans hotel in Las Vegas, and selling pieces of himself at 1.45 markup.  My senses tell me it's not quite worth it in the longrun, but that's okay, I feel good karma around Mr. Micon tonight.

Months from now I will be living the dream, playing poker tournaments in Las Vegas.

For now I live vicariously through the chairman.  It's a small investment, but every bitcoin is precious.  And I've been spending large lately.  An unexpected flat tire, and some hotel rooms to relax.  I hope Mr. Micon can expand my nest egg.

Saturday, September 29, 2012

small revenge

I made a small revenge against the veganhippie today.  He sat with 3300 and some odd amount of chips, seemingly the end of his bankroll, at 25/50 PLO8 on Seals.

I hit him with a check-raise on the flop and another one on the turn, with QcTcAx2x on a Jx9c4c6c board.  Hippie made a worse flush and worse low draw, so he had no choice but to fall for the trap and get scooped. 

It's not always easy being green.

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

why I play for bitcoins

Bitcoin is a new technology that I would describe as a magical way to move money around. You can do your own research for a more technical explanation.

Before my divorce I read something and invested a small amount, to try it out. I won a sports bet, then managed to grind my little bankroll of 3 bitcoins up to 58 bitcoins, during the last month living with my wife while we weren't really talking to each other.

Since then I've gotten it as high as 106 bitcoins, before I got into trouble against the veganhippie, down to 90 bitcoins and now up to 98.56.

I enjoy grinding bitcoins. The ecosystem is small, but there's a more vibrant feel to it than to the US dollar websites. (Bitcoin has been steadily gaining value. People who own bitcoins are probably less likely to be affected by a decline in the mainstream economy. There are no complications depositing and withdrawing that weed it down to only serious players.)

I like playing HU and short-handed, so there's enough action for me to make it my primary grind. I don't need a million tables or a big tournament schedule.

I don't have many expenses anyways, basically just food, gas, and litter for my cat. (And I really don't even NEED gas, I can just stay parked for a few days if I'm running bad. And I can let the cat crap on the floor if it was really that urgent.) What's most important to me is that my money is safe and that I can quickly withdraw it when I want it.

I also have a gut feeling that the value of bitcoins will continue going up.

So that's why I play poker for bitcoins. If anyone reading this blog ever needs help exchanging in and out of bitcoins, don't hesitate to let me know.

I also play on the Merge and Revolution networks, but I find myself putting less time, money, and concentration into them.  Why do I want to play against nits for a declining currency that's a hassle to withdraw?  I'm also getting sick of being moved to a new skin or even a new network whenever the sites jumble themselves around to be able to keep skirting the law or what have you.

Monday, September 24, 2012


Tilting night in the BTC poker arena. I was playing Scumpson, at 50/100 PLO8 on Sealswithclubs. (This is ~$120 buy-in, for anyone who doesn't know.) Scumpson can play good sometimes, but on this night I was just much better than him. Nothing was gonna go wrong.

Then the veganhippie sat down. This offered a new twist, and the veganhippie ran really good against me. He got it in kind of bad twice and came away with a scoop and a chop.

Later I raised 8867 (spades) on the button, and player 'sub' re-raised from the SB. Flop came 974 with 2 spades. He bet, I shoved, he elected to just call to save himself the chance to get lucky on the turn and then feel like he didn't get it in bad, turn was a red ace, he put in the rest, I made the curse/call, and he found a way to scoop with A336.

Sometimes that happens, sometimes you lose. But it's too bad it happened playing the 50/100 level. If I ran bad yesterday instead of today it would have been less costly. I had 106 bitcoins, now I have 90.

I'm recently divorced, living in my van while I travel through the USA. It's the best method I can think of to achieve my lifelong dream of professional internet poker playing. I'm starting here in rural Washington D.C., and I'll travel West. Eventually making it to Las Vegas, NV, where I will try my destiny at the 2013 World Series of Poker.

Follow my journey, root me on.